Are we into the blame games?
Blame
To err is human, to forgive divine. We all make mistakes but then choose to declare someone or something else responsible for the wrong. So do others. And thus the vicious game of pointing fingers goes on.
What is wiser? To accept one’s fault graciously or to hold anyone or anything but oneself accountable? Do we not delegate our power too by this act?
Join me in today’s episode to learn how the termite of blame eats away our positive energy.
Read my Blogs:-
https://sumedhakatariaias.blogspot.com/2021/06/elan-vital-sumedha-kataria-talks-1.html
https://sumedhakatariaias.blogspot.com/2021/06/elan-vital-sumedha-kataria-talks-2.html
https://sumedhakatariaias.blogspot.com/2021/06/elan-vital-sumedha-kataria-talks-13.html
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This was a very beautiful episode. Such characters are always around us. Totally relate to this. We need to keep ourselves sane in such situations and deal with them with a positive mindset.
Thanka Meenuji. Regards
Beautiful episode… Ma’am
कहाँ कहाँ से चुन चुन कर विषय पकडे हैं और खूब पकडे हैं…sumedha जी
दूसरे को दोष दे कर खुद बच निकलना बहुत आसान होता है ना…. 😊
बहुत कुछ सोचने पर विवश कर देतें हैं आपके episodes.
अति सुन्दर rythmic heading
Blame Game
अति उत्तम explanation 👌👌
हस कर कबूल क्या कर ली…..
चिराग जलाने का सलीका सीखो…
🌹बहुत खूब लिखा जी 🌹
सादर नमन
सादर आभार
💞💞💞💞💞💞
खुद सा ढूंढने निकलोगे तो अकेले रह जाओगे जनाब….. दो गज़ की दूरी पर कितनों से? हमारे बुज़ुर्ग कहा करते थे कि बुरे से मत भागो बुराई से भागो… And i think if we are running away or keeping a distance from from anybody saying that their negativity is affecing us then in a way we are again into a blame game. My positive attitude should be so strong that others negativity don’t affect me because I am responsible for my own behavior and none else… A very well chosen topic and nicely elaborated and explained. Every time you make us feel proud.
I am reminded of a story of Krishana. He always used to see good in every thing. Sudama His friend and Balram His brother used to get irritated sometimes. They both once decided and planned something in order to listen negative remarks from Krishna. They took Him to a pitch dark street, there was a sick dog suffering badly from skin disease. Puss and blood was oozing out of dog and was smelling very bad. It was not even possible to cross from that place. Now as per planning Sudama and Balram asked Krishna to stop there near the dog expecting Krishna negative reaction and remarks. But they were shocked when Krishna uttered बलराम सुदामा देखो इस कुत्ते की आंखें कितनी सुंदर है और कैसे इस अंधेरे में भी चमक रही हैं. Everyone and everything has positive and negative aspects it depends what we find.
Your all episodes are marvellous. Each and every episode give us inspiration and fill us wth positivity. Also teach us so many lessons. Really your thinking as well as expression both are beyond words. Regards….
Wah wah shah ji. Thank you so much for another beautiful topic – The blame game. I wonder that how do you choose such sensitive topics. आप तो जैसे सब के मन की बात ही पड़ लेते हो। इस विषय को इतना सरल बना कर समझाया कि अंदर ही उतर गया। it’s a bitter fact that we have blammers around us n we can’t ignore as well. But you very well expressed how to handle too. Thank you so much dear for being there in our lives. May God bless you in abundance. Waiting eagerly for the next podcast.
Thanks Ranju, regards
Very well elaborated thought! Certainly our energy gets depleted and corrupted unawares in this blame game, whosoever be the blamer. Another imperceptible attitude close to this blame game is to consider all truth about ourselves as ‘blames’ when pointed out. Really tough to deal with it all. Such hidden viruses are very successfully exposed and effective treatment is prescribed in each of your episodes. Wonderful presentation once again!
Well said..its’ hidden virus’. Thanks. Regards
Absolutely amazing! Kitne pyar se ek aina (mirror) samne rakh diya. Thank you so much ma’am!! Waiting for your next podcast.🙏🙏🎊🎊🌹🌹
Thanks Anjali. Regards
Respected ma’am,
Namaskar. Beautifully spoken by you . Having negativity surely kills a person . We should always be positive about everything . Thankyou so much ma’am for such a magnificent message .
Thanks Kaushalya ji. Regards
Respected Mam,
Once again, the 16th episode in the series of ‘Urja Aparimit’ has shed light on some very ‘commonplace’ situation that is around us; in fact, we are an inextricable part of it, as you also pointed out.
Now, the best thing about the lecture is the last leg, to be quite honest, the solution part, after 9 or 10 minutes you take us to the solution of the problem, after having described the things in detail.
Blamers are always around us, but there is one thing I want to discuss that a certain power structure or power hierarchy (I am sure there must be a better word for it which I am not able to find right now) is always there. I mean, a blamer is not a ‘fixed’ person. I can be receiver at the office but I can be a blamer at home.
But the main point is our ‘urja’ is lost in both the cases as you also mentioned.
Furthermore, it becomes very hard to counter such people, as you very rightly pointed out.
And I am going to give credit to you to giving expressions to the feelings that we experience very often but are not able to understand or express, for several reasons- our immature mind, the fast pace of life, the internalization of the power structure at home/ office, out of love, or just like that.
For instance, how often we find ‘sisters’ labelled as ‘jhalli’ or ‘seedhi’ or ‘lallu’ for that matter by the brothers. It might be out of love, but what is it doing to the sisters? They are losing their ‘voice.’ They internalize those comments and their energy is impacted directly because of that. And, this is the reason, she needs a brother, a husband, or someone else, a son may be, who could hold her, guide her through in her life.
It is remarkable how you have unearthed this thing in this series.
Another great aspect of the lecture is the thrust upon the conscious effort that we have to make to save our ‘urja’ – it is amazing how beautifully and outrightly you said-
We are 100% responsible for preserving / safeguarding our Urja- come what may.
There are many incidents that I was recalling as I was listening to your podcast message, which have happened with me personally. And, I could relate to what you said,
“बस यही सोच करे
बस यही सोच करे
कोई सफाई नहीं दी हुम्ने
की इलज़ाम झूठे ही सही
पर लगाये तो तुमने हैं
”
Such people are blamers but they are most negative ones who impact our energy and that we got to be careful of them- this is a great message- an eye-opener!
And, the most complicated part is those people are incorrigible and it is hard to deal with them since they won’t understand the logic! (How complex human nature is!)
Maintaining the “proverbial social’ distance” is a great solution. And, staying silent may also work I reckon.
Going back to the same point, as I discussed the plight of a women in her role as a sister, the women face adversities as wives too! How often we see her getting reprimanded at home by their husbands? And, even sometimes husbands speak ill of her in front of others. And, how meekly they accept it (the times are of course are changing now!).
But I tell you mam, such feelings pent-up in the person, and at a certain stage the women explode and then we call the females to be taking the ‘Durga Avatar.’
Well, the discussion can go on endlessly, since human nature is quite complex and such characters are always around us; and sometimes, we are also one of them!
Thanks mam, once again for this enlightening message.
On a critical note, and I apologize for that in advance, you seemed to be lacking the forceful voice of yours; you sounded cautious today (one thing), or maybe you might have been unwell (second thing), I am not sure.
Yet, you have broached upon a very sensitive topic per se and your understanding is really insightful. The solution part being the best!
And, as for the next lectures in the series, I would suggest if you could talk about the ‘sub-conscious’ mind in some of your next lectures, it would be great, since most of our actions are governed by the ‘sub-conscious’ mind.
Having said this, I am sure you are already working on finding some complex and sensitive topics that deplete our ‘urja’ and you will definitely explain them to us in a lucid manner, as you have been doing.
Sincerely, your effort to make us understand the human nature and their psychology with the main focus on preserving the ‘urja’ and using it for a noble cause are bringing a huge change in my way of thinking and the approach I adopt towards my life.
Stay happy and blessed mam!
Looking forward to more of such messages that motivate us to retrospect and take control over our lives!
Regards
Sachin
Thanks Sachin..also for the critical note. Qud be careful in future. Regards
Very impactful and very well explained the topic of BLAME GAME it’s so easy to put the blame on someone n escape but you can’t escape from your inner self as you have started your podcast by giving your own example of childhood. It’s better not to play this game though it’s very easy and be away from the blamers as you have told that they spread negativity. Each n every topic of yours is worth listening . Thank you Sumedha ji 🙏
Thanks Poonam di. Regards
Simply Amazing with Amazingly Simple Content…..
Great episode mem g
आपकी ऊर्जा भी वास्तव में अपरिमित ह । आपका शब्द कोष अपरिमित ह। आपका शब्दो का चयन व उनका स्वभाविक प्रयोग वास्तव में आश्चर्य चकित करता ह ।
very nicely explained 🙏🙏
very nicely explained 🙏🙏
Very nice topic…jai hind
Wonderful Topic
Well Defined
Such characters are always around us.
दो गज़ की दूरी……Well
Hats off 🙏
Regards
🙏
अपने आपका कैसे अधिकतम सदुपयोग करें, यही हर कड़ी में और अच्छे से जानने को मिलता है. अकारण जो सर पर बोझ हम उठाये रहते हैं, उससे निजात मिलती है और जीवन उद्देश्य के प्रति सजगता बढ़ती है. ये सब अध्यात्म के बड़े दायरे में प्रवेश की तैयारी भी है. ये जीवन की समग्र अप्रोच है.
बहुत अच्छा अनुभव इन्हें सुनते जाने का..
आभार,
विकास
Very well written, Vikas. Thanks. Regards
So many of us are facing this problem of blame games. You have presented a revealing psychological analysis of this tendency, covering the element of Narcissism hidden behind the blame games. Your understanding of such issues is brilliant. Literary allusions and relevant anecdotes well illustrate the points you make. Thanks for this well informed podcast!
Thanks sir, pl keep motivating. Regards
Once again you have explained such a common and day to day problem very impressively.All of us face this problem but we hardly think and pay attention to such things. This habit of blaming others depletes us of our energy slowly. You have rightly given some methods also to deal with such people. It’s an eye-opener for many people. Thanks for such wonderful thoughts
Jee pranam. Thanks and regards
Hon’ble Madam ji, Parnaam. The present episode draws perfect picture of human behavior and the blame game. If one own its duties and obligations honestly and sincerely he will not need blame game. The attitude in performing the duties and obligations needs to be changed from “I have to do” to “I want to do” and the things and behaviour in the society will be without blame game.
With all regards and best wishes.
Jai Parkash Sharma, Advocate
🙏
खुद सा ढूंढने निकलोगे तो अकेले रह जाओगे जनाब….. दो गज़ की दूरी पर कितनों से? हमारे बुज़ुर्ग कहा करते थे कि बुरे से मत भागो बुराई से भागो… And i think if we are running away or keeping a distance from from anybody saying that their negativity is affecing us then in a way we are again into a blame game. My positive attitude should be so strong that others negativity don’t affect me because I am responsible for my own behavior and none else… A very well chosen topic and nicely elaborated and explained. Every time you make us feel proud.
I am reminded of a story of Krishana. He always used to see good in every thing. Sudama His friend and Balram His brother used to get irritated sometimes. They both once decided and planned something in order to listen negative remarks from Krishna. They took Him to a pitch dark street, there was a sick dog suffering badly from skin disease. Puss and blood was oozing out of dog and was smelling very bad. It was not even possible to cross from that place. Now as per planning Sudama and Balram asked Krishna to stop there near the dog expecting Krishna negative reaction and remarks. But they were shocked when Krishna uttered बलराम सुदामा देखो इस कुत्ते की आंखें कितनी सुंदर है और कैसे इस अंधेरे में भी चमक रही हैं. Everyone and everything has positive and negative aspects it depends what we find.
Thanks Anjali, for this beautiful anecdote from Krsna’s life. Regards
Nice eposide madam ji
🙏
Truely defined most common behaviour of people around us. But leaving them behind we should maintain दो गज की दूरी as said is only answer to these people. We shouldn’t take them much seriously and should keep going as we wish with positive attitude.
Sometime it’s very painful also when you have no option accept listening them. They may be in relations or work places. This is all about life as we can’t zero down these people so we should enjoy life with family & so many good people around us. We should make habit to spend time with positive people who can sense our feelings of sorrow n joy too. Great learning and motivational episode Regards 🙏🙏
Yes..a bigger of line of positivity from qhwrever we get strengthens us. Regards
R/Mam, Thanks very much once again for this Amazing podcast which again gave gave us direction to live calm n happy life. Hats Off to You👍Your tips of social distancing , shield , dhaal etc. Steeled / strengthened my mind once again, and again, and many more again✌This way, sometimes I realize that I’m being connected to Spiritualism too which is the most beautiful n required part of this life, especially most asked for, at this age. AMAZING👌is the GEM DR. SUMEDHA KATARIA JI who is such a rare n unique , medical / spiritual store house…who presents each n every podcast in such a wonderful manner that it directly n immediately heals the wavering/ sick mind, body n soul. I dedicate thiz lines to you — ” Ye Chand Sa Sunder Podcast….,Uspe Shield Ka Gehna….., Ye Blame Culture Ki Habits…., Ka ilaaz Hai Social Distance….., TAREEF KAROON KYA USKI….JISNE TUMHE BANAYA…..” Lots of Love ❤ n Regards 🙏
R/Mam, Thanks very much once again for this Amazing podcast which again gave gave us direction to live calm n happy life. Hats Off to You👍Your tips of social distancing , shield , dhaal etc. Steeled / strengthened my mind once again, and again, and many more again✌This way, sometimes I realize that I’m being connected to Spiritualism too which is the most beautiful n required part of this life, especially most asked for, at this age. AMAZING👌is the GEM DR. SUMEDHA KATARIA JI who is such a rare n unique , medical / spiritual store house…who presents each n every podcast in such a wonderful manner that it directly n immediately heals the wavering/ sick mind, body n soul. I dedicate thiz lines to you — ” Ye Chand Sa Sunder Podcast….,Uspe Shield Ka Gehna….., Ye Blame Culture Ki Habits…., Ka ilaaz Hai Social Distance….., TAREEF KAROON KYA USKI….JISNE TUMHE BANAYA…..” Lots of Love ❤ n Regards 🙏
Namaskar Sunitaji, zarranawazee ke liye aabhar. Regards
Nice Episode Mam ji 👍defined in highly effective way
Yes,dear we all are into blame game. Sometime as blamers and sometimes as receivers .यहां तक कि किस्मत और परमात्मा को भी blame कर देते हैं।ये भी नहीं सोचते कि बीज तो हमने ही बोया हुआ है।
कितना appropriate गाना चुना है आपने *blame it on rain…..* बिल्कुल सही हम किसी को भी नहीं छोड़ते।वाकई चारित्रिक दृढ़ता की कमी की वजह से ही हम ये करते हैं।हम ये भूल जाते हैं कि स्वयं का बचाव करने के लिए हम दूसरों पर दोषारोपण तो कर देते हैं पर समय के पास सच साबित करने के अपने तरीके हैं।
क्या खूब कहा है
बस यही सोच कर
कोई सफाई नहीं दी हमने
कि इलज़ाम झूठे ही सही
पर लगाये तो तुमने हैं
*Internalisation and externalisation,SOP,defense tool,narcissim,दो गज़ दूरी, है ज़रूरी…* इन के द्वारा आपने कितने अच्छे से blaming के बारे में समझाया है।
Infact when we blame and criticize others, we avoid some truths about ourselves.
*चिराग़ जलाने का सलीका सीखो साहब, हवाओं पे इल्ज़ाम लगाने से क्या होगा…*
जी बिल्कुल सही कहा आपने हमें blamers से दूरी बना के रखनी चाहिए -बहुत नकारात्मकता आती है,हमारी ऊर्जा क्षीण हो जाती है पर उसी तरह से हमें अपने अंदर भी झांक के देखना चाहिए कि कहीं हम भी तो वही नहीं कर रहे।हमारे लिए भी तो ये उतना ही आसान होता है न दूसरों पर दोष मढ़ना।समय- समय पर check करते रहना चाहिए।Blame करना और स्वीकारना दोनों ही नकारात्मकता से भरते हैं। दूसरों की बातों की वजह से ख़ुद को भी blame नहीं करना है।Guilt mode में नहीं जाना है।
*हँसकर कबूल क्या कर लीं सजाएँ मैंने… ज़माने ने दस्तूर ही बना लिया हर इलज़ाम मुझ पर …*
कहां कहां से चुन कर लाते हैं आप quotes, शायरी और सब से बड़ कर topics-हर topic इतना महत्वपूर्ण होता है पर हम उन पर ध्यान ही नहीं देते।आप हर विषय को इतनी ख़ूबसूरती से समझाते हो और उसका हल भी बताते हो कि लगता है की हम भी इस से निकल सकते हैं और सकारात्मकता से जीवन जी सकते हैं। *हमें आधे गिलास खाली वाले नज़रिए वालों से बच के रहना सीखना है और अपना गिलास आधा भरा है वाला नज़रिया रखना है-इस बार का मूलमंत्र ये मिला है।*
शुक्रिया आपका फिर से एक बार गागर में सागर भर के अपने ज्ञान के ख़ज़ाने से हमें मार्गदर्शन देने का🙏🙏🙏
Someone has rightly said *Small minded people blame others. Average people blame themselves.Wise see all blame as foolishness.*
तो चुनना हमें ही है कि हम कैसे जीवन जीना चाहते हैं,आपने तो रास्ते बता दिए हैं।
God bless you always and you keep guiding us.Waiting for next podcast for getting guidance on another important aspect of life. 🙏❤️🙏
Thanks SS for the comprehensive note that opens einfow for new meanings and learning. Regards
आप का हर एपिसोड प्रेरणादायक है।आप की ऊर्जा भगवान की देन है। कहा से तलाश करती हों हर शब्द।इस एपिसोड में जे वह सब हे जी जीवन की सच्चाई है।साधुवाद
Jee pranam. Aabhar aashirwad ke liye. Regards
वाह कितने सुंदर शब्द हैं चिराग जलाने का हुनर सीखो यारों, हवाओं को गिला देने से क्या फायदा। वास्तव में जीवन मे न जाने कितनी बार हम छोटे बच्चों की तरह दूसरों पर अपनी गलतियों का दोष मढ देते हैं। धन्यवाद आपका। प्रयास करेंगे और आत्म विश्लेषण करेंगे अपना कि कहीं हम भी तो ऐसा नहीं कर रहे।
Yahi soch taakat hai…regards
Very true. Easiest thing is to blame others for all the wrongs done to us. But we should take the difficult but glorious path of accepting our mistakes gracefully and move to greater heights of success. Blamegames lead us nowhere. Warm regards mam.
Thanks Anitaji. Regards
Great
Awesome Mam
Blame game. How careful can one be? Accepting mistakes/shortcomings brings peace and learning.